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lavengro-第41部分

小说: lavengro 字数: 每页4000字

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'May I request to know who you are; gentlemen?' said the 

magistrate。



'Sir;' said the man in a deep; but not unpleasant voice; 'allow me 

to introduce to you my friend; Mr。 …; the celebrated pugilist'; and 

he motioned with his hand towards the massive man with the 

flattened nose。



'And your own name; sir?' said the magistrate。



'My name is no matter;' said the man; 'were I to mention it to you; 

it would awaken within you no feeling of interest。  It is neither 

Kean nor Belcher; and I have as yet done nothing to distinguish 

myself like either of those individuals; or even like my friend 

here。  However; a time may come … we are not yet buried; and 

whensoever my hour arrives; I hope I shall prove myself equal to my 

destiny; however high …





'Like bird that's bred amongst the Helicons。'





And here a smile half theatrical passed over his features。



'In what can I oblige you; sir?' said the magistrate。



'Well; sir; the soul of wit is brevity; we want a place for an 

approaching combat between my friend here and a brave from town。  

Passing by your broad acres this fine morning we saw a pightle; 

which we deemed would suit。  Lend us that pightle; and receive our 

thanks; 'twould be a favour; though not much to grant:  we neither 

ask for Stonehenge nor for Tempe。'



My friend looked somewhat perplexed; after a moment; however; he 

said; with a firm but gentlemanly air; 'Sir; I am sorry that I 

cannot comply with your request。'



'Not comply!' said the man; his brow becoming dark as midnight; and 

with a hoarse and savage tone; 'Not comply! why not?'



'It is impossible; sir; utterly impossible!'



'Why so?'



'I am not compelled to give my reasons to you; sir; nor to any 

man。'



'Let me beg of you to alter your decision;' said the man; in a tone 

of profound respect。



'Utterly impossible; sir; I am a magistrate。'



'Magistrate! then fare ye well; for a green…coated buffer and a 

Harmanbeck。'



'Sir!' said the magistrate; springing up with a face fiery with 

wrath。



But; with a surly nod to me; the man left the apartment; and in a 

moment more the heavy footsteps of himself and his companion were 

heard descending the staircase。



'Who is that man?' said my friend; turning towards me。



'A sporting gentleman; well known in the place from which I come。'



'He appeared to know you。'



'I have occasionally put on the gloves with him。'



'What is his name?'







CHAPTER XXV







Doubts … Wise king of Jerusalem … Let me see … A thousand years … 

Nothing new … The crowd … The hymn … Faith … Charles Wesley … There 

he stood … Farewell; brother … Death … Sun; moon; and stars … Wind 

on the heath。



THERE was one question which I was continually asking myself at 

this period; and which has more than once met the eyes of the 

reader who has followed me through the last chapter:  'What is 

truth?'  I had involved myself imperceptibly in a dreary labyrinth 

of doubt; and; whichever way I turned; no reasonable prospect of 

extricating myself appeared。  The means by which I had brought 

myself into this situation may be very briefly told; I had inquired 

into many matters; in order that I might become wise; and I had 

read and pondered over the words of the wise; so called; till I had 

made myself master of the sum of human wisdom; namely; that 

everything is enigmatical and that man is an enigma to himself; 

thence the cry of 'What is truth?'  I had ceased to believe in the 

truth of that in which I had hitherto trusted; and yet could find 

nothing in which I could put any fixed or deliberate belief … I 

was; indeed; in a labyrinth!  In what did I not doubt?  With 

respect to crime and virtue I was in doubt; I doubted that the one 

was blamable and the other praiseworthy。  Are not all things 

subjected to the law of necessity?  Assuredly time and chance 

govern all things:  Yet how can this be? alas!



Then there was myself; for what was I born?  Are not all things 

born to be forgotten?  That's incomprehensible:  yet is it not so?  

Those butterflies fall and are forgotten。  In what is man better 

than a butterfly?  All then is born to be forgotten。  Ah! that was 

a pang indeed; 'tis at such a moment that a man wishes to die。  The 

wise king of Jerusalem; who sat in his shady arbours beside his 

sunny fish…pools; saying so many fine things; wished to die; when 

he saw that not only all was vanity; but that he himself was 

vanity。  Will a time come when all will be forgotten that now is 

beneath the sun?  If so; of what profit is life?



In truth it was a sore vexation of spirit to me when I saw; as the 

wise man saw of old; that whatever I could hope to perform must 

necessarily be of very temporary duration; and if so; why do it?  I 

said to myself; whatever name I can acquire; will it endure for 

eternity? scarcely so。  A thousand years?  Let me see! what have I 

done already?  I have learnt Welsh; and have translated the songs 

of Ab Gwilym; some ten thousand lines; into English rhyme; I have 

also learnt Danish; and have rendered the old book of ballads cast 

by the tempest upon the beach into corresponding English metre。  

Good! have I done enough already to secure myself a reputation of a 

thousand years?  No; no! certainly not; I have not the slightest 

ground for hoping that my translations from the Welsh and Danish 

will be read at the end of a thousand years。  Well; but I am only 

eighteen; and I have not stated all that I have done; I have learnt 

many other tongues; and have acquired some knowledge even of Hebrew 

and Arabic。  Should I go on in this way till I am forty; I must 

then be very learned; and perhaps; among other things; may have 

translated the Talmud; and some of the great works of the Arabians。  

Pooh! all this is mere learning and translation; and such will 

never secure immortality。  Translation is at best an echo; and it 

must be a wonderful echo to be heard after the lapse of a thousand 

years。  No! all I have already done; and all I may yet do in the 

same way; I may reckon as nothing … mere pastime; something else 

must be done。  I must either write some grand original work; or 

conquer an empire; the one just as easy as the other。  But am I 

competent to do either?  Yes; I think I am; under favourable 

circumstances。  Yes; I think I may promise myself a reputation of a 

thousand years; if I do but give myself the necessary trouble。  

Well! but what's a thousand years after all; or twice a thousand 

years?  Woe is me!  I may just as well sit still。



'Would I had never been born!' I said to myself; and a thought 

would occasionally intrude:  But was I ever born?  Is not all that 

I see a lie … a deceitful phantom?  Is there a world; and earth; 

and sky?  Berkeley's doctrine … Spinoza's doctrine!  Dear reader; I 

had at that time never read either Berkeley or Spinoza。  I have 

still never read them; who are they; men of yesterday?  'All is a 

lie … all a deceitful phantom;' are old cries; they come naturally 

from the mouths of those who; casting aside that choicest shield 

against madness; simplicity; would fain be wise as God; and can 

only know that they are naked。  This doubting in the 'universal 

all' is almost coeval with the human race:  wisdom; so called; was 

early sought after。  All is a lie … a deceitful phantom … was said 

when the world was yet young; its surface; save a scanty portion; 

yet untrodden by human foot; and when the great tortoise yet 

crawled about。  All is a lie; was the doctrine of Buddh; and Buddh 

lived thirty centuries before the wise king of Jerusalem; who sat 

in his arbours; beside his sunny fish…pools; saying many fine 

things; and; amongst others; 'There is nothing new under the sun!'





One day; whilst I bent my way to the heath of which I have spoken 

on a former occasion; at the foot of the hills which formed it I 

came to a place where a wagon was standing; but without horses; the 

shafts resting on the ground; there was a crowd about it; which 

extended half…way up the side of the neighbouring hill。  The wagon 

was occupied by some half a dozen men; some sitting; others 

standing … they were dressed in sober…coloured habiliments of black 

or brown; cut in a plain and rather uncouth fashion; and partially 

white with dust; their hair was short; and seemed to have been 

smoothed down by the application of the hand; all were bareheaded … 

sitting or standing; all were bareheaded。  One of them; a tall man; 

was speaking as I arrived; ere; however; I could distinguish what 

he was saying; he left off; and then there was a cry for a hymn 'to 

the glory of God' … that was the word。  It was a strange…sounding 

hymn; as well it might be; for everybody joined in it:  there were 

voices of all kinds; of men; of women; and of children … of those 

who could sing and of thos

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